Wow. Another year?
Dec/090
Happy New Year!
Seriously. Its here already? I feel like I haven’t even stopped to realize that a whole year is about to come to a close today. I’ve hardly reflected on this past year in my head, let alone thought about what to write down. As last year came to a close, I was so reflective. I guess I was way more ahead of the game a year ago. I’m so behind right now. In fact, I just looked at my 4 month white board planner on my office wall and realized that it still has November and all of December on it! It’s been a whirlwind, but at the same time, a year ago seems sooo long ago.
I got my first camera in 2009. I turned 25 years old. I became a home owner. I celebrated 2 new lives with my very best friends. I celebrated my first anniversary and my brother’s engagement. This is good stuff, ya know? Writing about my life this last year has really helped me gain a greater perspective. When I am excited, happy and celebrating, I can write about it. When I’m feeling down and distracted, I can write about it. And then, I can look over the posts that are full of blessings and realize all that I have. Its good to count your blessings. Its so easy to get caught up in what isn’t going well “right in this moment” and overlook the multitude of gifts that God has placed in your life. I am grateful for this year. I am grateful for all that God has given to me, and all that He took away or did not bestow on me. I believe He is watching out for my greater purpose. Maybe He is in every detail. Maybe He is not. But I do know that He loves me and He wants to use me to do good in other people’s lives.
There are a lot of things I want to accomplish this year. I want to strengthen my photo business. I want to cook more. I want to exercise more. Be on time to work. I really want to read more. Invest in my mind. I get so tired of thinking that, lately, I’ve really dreaded reading a WHOLE book. This is so unlike me. Its driving me crazy. So, I’m determined to actually read more. I also want to help our church make a greater impact on our community, especially those that NEED us, our resources, our time, our money. I feel like God is stirring this in me, and this is the year for me to take action.
I pray that this year is dedicated my God, my husband, my family, and my friends. That it is an adventure. That I worry less and enjoy more. That I keep a smile on my face. And I pray blessings, happiness and peace over all the friends I know and love. May this be the best year yet.
My dad posted this today and I thought it was lovely:
“For last year’s words belong to last year’s language and next year’s words await another voice. And to make an end is to make a beginning. ” T. S. Eliot
Happy Beginnings.
The Infamous Teddy Bear
Dec/091
This year, the girls decided we wouldn’t exchange gifts. Not everyone could be there for our usual Christmas dinner and life sure has changed since last December. Cheri, Lyndsey, Becca & I opted for a more informal afternoon of coffee, tea and dessert…and babies. However, Cheri & I could not resist getting “our” little ones presents for their very first Christmas. We opted for baby clothes, of course. They are all just too cute. I was to shop for Zeda and I had about $100 worth of clothes in my hands before I realized it. Leggings, dresses, sweaters, jeans, socks, headbands…. I am going to be in some serious trouble whenever I have a baby. I settled on a cute little sweater and Cheri picked up the best little puff vest, hat & gloves for Owen. I wasn’t feeling too hot the night before we all hung out. So I headed to Walgreens to get some Sudafed and cough drops. And then I saw the cutest little Christmas teddy bear. It was so soft. I decided to attach it to Zeda’s gift. And, I’m afraid I brought on a new obsession for my dear little Z. She wouldn’t let it go. She sucked on that thing like there was no tomorrow. Mostly on the bear’s nose. Then people started making jokes about WHY she was sucking on the bear’s nose, asking if Zeda was hungry and suggesting that it’s nose resembled something else…. 
Anyway, the Christmas bear was a quite a hit. Who knew $5 at Walgreens could go so far?
Most Wonderful Time
Dec/090
It seriously is the most wonderful time of the year. I just love to celebrate and spend time with friends and family. We had a great trip to Springfield and even had snow on Christmas Eve and Christmas which just made Nik’s day. It was a relaxing week that went at the perfect pace. It was awesome. We got home late Saturday night and anxiously awaited Derek’s homecoming yesterday. We had a great “White” Christmas last night with Nik’s family. I am blessed to have such great family units. Now, I’m ready to celebrate the New Year!
Cynthia (Anthony's fiance) opening her presents before heading off to Cali
The Matrone Fam (minus Cynthia)
Nik LOVING the snow on Christmas morning
The White Family
All is Well
Dec/090
All is well, all is well
Life up your voice and sing
Born is now Emmanuel
Born is our Lord and Savior
Sing Alleluia
All is well
(Words by Wayne Kirkpatrick)
My dad’s choir sang this song last night at our Christmas Eve service. I’ve heard this song so many times growing up. It is always moving to me because it brings me back to my childhood. But it was different this year, sitting at my home church, grown up and realizing the REAL meaning of “all is well.” It brought me to tears. I am ever so thankful for the God that I serve and for the message of Jesus. I am so thankful for my husband, my family and friends and all the blessings that I have in my life. All is well.
My parents house on Christmas morning.
Home for the Holidays
Dec/090
Tomorrow, Nik & I will be heading to Springfield to spend Christmas with my family. I’m so excited to be at home for Christmas this year (we were with Nik’s family last year). I did manage to squeeze a visit home right after Christmas last year, but being there on the actual DAY will be even better. I checked the weather a couple of days ago, and it was calling for snow on Christmas Eve. I have been away from snow long enough to actually want to have some (especially, since I’ll get to leave the cold!). But of course, I checked the weather today and there is no snow in the forecast anymore. I think that Nik is bad luck when it comes to the snow. The two just don’t mix, I guess. Since I have my camera this year, I will probably take tons of pictures this year. I can hardly find any from last year except this one of the girls. 
Here’s a picture of my parents house in January when it WAS snowing. I’m hoping and praying that we get to see at least some flurries!
Well, I am off to officially start my Christmas Vacation!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!
Beautiful Life
Dec/092
Beautiful, beautiful life.
So often…rather, more often than not, I consume myself with the chaos of decision making and life planning. Nik and I have made lots of decisions lately. Back and forth, Up and down. I’ve exhausted myself over the last 6 months as we have been trying to lay the best foundation for our life and future family. My brain and body, spirit and soul, have been completely pushed to the max. I’ve been hopeful and discouraged, excited and disappointed. I’ve dreamed and I’ve given up, I’ve laughed and I’ve cried. This is what life is made up of, right? This is how it will always be. We will have days of 100% certainty, and days of 100% unknown. We will have visions that we will have to lay down and new adventures that come out of the blue. We will have open doors and closed doors. Life is not like the even and straight plains of Kansas. Instead, there are mountains and valleys, mountains and valleys, mountains and valleys.
Relationships that stand the test of this roller coaster life, is what makes life worth it. These relationships bring the beauty of life out. Family. Friends. My God.
Right now, I’m crashing. I’m literally falling apart as I come off of a very stressful few months. I could probably fall asleep at my desk this very minute. As terrible as crashing can be, my crashing seems so beautiful this week. I’m crashing into the arms of my husband. I’m crashing into the calmness and soothing tone of my mother’s voice. I’m crashing into the family text message pictures that my father keeps sending me. I’m crashing into the woman at church who told me “God wants you to know that He loves you so much.” I’m crashing into my friend Sonya who stood with me in her bedroom, tears in her eyes, with amazing words of affirmation for my life. I’m crashing into the very things I have been building. The things that God has blessed me with. He has been in every moment of my crash, reminding me that through obedience and perseverance, He provides us a time and a place to crash into His ever amazing love and comfort.
Such beauty. An incredibly beautiful life.
Moments Later…
Dec/090
Just a few quick hours after writing my last post, The Giving Spirit, I stumbled across my cousin’s post which was incredibly touching and moving, and in the same mind that I have been reading and writing about this morning. I think God is really trying to get at my heart today about giving. Read The Bald Little Black Girl and consider giving internationally as well as to your local community.
Have a blessed day.
The Giving Spirit
Dec/091
Giving is talked about through the entire Bible. Its such a vital part of being a Christian. Giving must be done in love (If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. 1 Corinthians 13:3). And God appreciates the cheerful giver (…for God loves a cheerful giver. 2 Corinthians 9:7). I think there is no other better time of the year to reevaluate your own giving attitude than during the Christmas season.
When I lived in Springfield, I was surrounded by poverty and people that were truly in need. I went to highschool with tons of kids that couldn’t even afford lunch. I studied poverty in college. I spent time with children in need on a weekly basis. My church was surrounded by a neighborhood stuck in the cycle of poverty. When I worked for the Children’s Pastor, we helped start an afterschool program for one of the elementary schools (one at the middle school was already in place). One year, a principal from another neighboring elementary school approached us about giving away Christmas presents to all the children at the school. I think that day changed my life a little bit. That year, we handed out presents to every child in that school. I remember standing there watching those kids dig into those presents while I choked back my tears. The next year, we handed out presents to that school and the school where we held our weekly after-school program. Last year, the church gave bikes to every child in the school. This year, the church is giving away almost 1,200 presents to both elementary schools and the middle school. Nik & I are going to be in town during one of the Present assemblies and are going to go along with my good friend, Cheri,to hand out gifts. I am so excited. So excited to see how God asked us to do something, and through obedience it has now hit this level of generosity. The pictures below are: Me, the first year when I wrapped all the presents myself…ha, I think I was delirious in this pic. The two on the right are from this year: Justin, the Children’s Pastor and Cheri, one of the Youth Pastors and one of my very closest friends.
Once I moved to Daphne, I realized that it was a much different culture. For the most part, there is plenty of money and plenty of resources. It took me awhile to find my “giving-nitch” down here. But, God so graciously pointed me in the direction of our Ruff Wilson Youth Club (these are the students that I have been driving every day). I will be honest and say that there have been many days that I have complained about driving that van. But, God spoke to me last month while I was at a Club board meeting. He said “Look. This is what you asked for: a group of children that were in need. You have resources. Rekindle that giving spirit.” So I have. And by doing so, I am able to offer up my own thankfulness to my Lord. What else can I give of myself? Can I outgive the God who saved me, who gives me all that I need?
Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in ever good work. 2 Corinthians 9:6-8
This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of God’s people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God. 2 Corinthians 9:12
The Girls
Dec/090
Well, I am counting down the days until I get to be at home for Christmas. Just 9 more days! I can’t wait to see my family, my newly engaged brother, my girls and all my babies! I’m sure Owen & Zeda will already look different to me. I can’t wait to cuddle and snuggle with them.
Last year, all 6 of us girls were able to be in the same place at the same time. We had a special little Christmas together. Unfortunately, we aren’t able to pull that off again. We are too spread out now! Its been quite the year between all of us. We’ve had 1 wedding, 2 moves, a job change, 2 first-time home owners, countless hair styles & colors (CHERI) and 2 babies! I’m sure this next year will prove even crazier, especially since the year will start with Christy’s husband being deployed overseas. Through it all, we will remain close.
About 6 months ago, I read an article in Real Simple about a group of friends that take yearly trips together. They are all spread out across the country raising families and working on their careers. But, they manage to take time out to have fun together as “the girls.” Each friend takes a turn planning the trip and working out a budget. So, I brought up the idea that maybe we should start doing that. Our first trip (if we can actually set a date!) is scheduled for this fall and, of course, I’m the first planner I hope we can pull it off because I think it will be a great tradition.
Here’s a couple pictures of us from our Christmas dinner last year…(Lyndsey had just found out she was pregnant but hadn’t told a soul!).
Another Year, Another Parade
Dec/090
I just finished my 3rd Christmas Parade here for the City of Daphne. Its crazy to think that I have lived down here long enough to accomplish that! It seems like I just left Springfield, my friends and my family. When I go back home for a visit, it feels like I never left and I can always just pick up where I left off. Of course, I have a whole other life here that I am fully immersed in. I am constantly trying to keep the balance between the two. In the back of my mind, I still wonder if I’ll ever move back home, close to family & friends again. Its hard to imagine starting a family someday without my parents nearby. On the other hand, I’m always up for the adventure that is laid out before me.
So much has happened over the last 2 1/2 years. An engagement, a wedding, a house, a new church built, friendships made, countless trips, Roman Street music, my photography…. It hasn’t been boring, that’s for sure. I think when you are young (which I still consider myself), you make this plan of how life will all happen. When I was graduating from college, I just imagined how the next few years of my life would go. You make plans and set goals and expect to accomplish certain things. A lot of those things that I had set out to do, I have not done at all. I never made it to the Peace Corp. I haven’t finished my Master’s in Counseling. I’m not working in the church as much as I had hoped to be. For someone like me, who is so goal oriented, its easy to look at these things as THINGS I HAVE FAILED TO DO. But, you know what? If I had done them, then I wouldn’t be able to do the things I’m doing now. I wouldn’t have married Nik. I wouldn’t have my beautiful home that I just might start a family in someday. I wouldn’t have been apart of Nik’s music. I wouldn’t have fallen in love with photography. I wouldn’t have met my friends here in Daphne or been a part of so many student’s lives. Life is a journey. That journey doesn’t include every single thing that you have wanted to do. But it does include the parts that you are supposed to take part in. Today, I’m thanking God for my journey and praying that I always follow the path that He has set out for me, even when I have no clue what it will look like.